“Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; for I shall yet praise Him, the help of my countenance and my God.” Psalm 42:11
There is no negative situation your marriage is going through that is beyond God’s healing and transformational power. Your marriage is not successful until it has first been through tough waters, and what makes your marriage strong is the challenges you have overcome.
Why are you cast down, O my soul? There are times when you feel that you married the wrong person or that the ‘other woman’ or ‘other man’ would have made a better spouse. But that is a lie from the devil! The enemy will surely give you very good reasons why your spouse is the wrong choice and cause you to despair. However, the truth is that God has provided a good strategy for you to overcome which is called hope!
Hope means to cherish a desire with anticipation; to want something to happen or be true. Hope is a precious gift from God to encourage you that great possibilities await you, and a great anchor to keep you secure from drifting towards the enemy’s lure (see Hebrews 6:19).
Hopelessness is a tool that Satan uses to destroy marriages, homes, businesses and individuals. Hopelessness brings despair, which in turn opens the door to wrong voices and influences. “Do not despair, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.” Nehemiah 8:10.Hope is a precious gift from God to encourage you that great possibilities await you. #hope #marriagehelp Click To Tweet
Hope transforms and does not disappoint.
“Now hope does not disappoint…” Romans 5:5
Hope agrees that the future is good. It agrees that better days are ahead. It sees ahead and trusts that the same power of God that removed past problems will settle the present and future ones.
Hope is God’s provision enabling you to focus on working out the solution to problems you face in your life. It provides patience for you to work out the changes you want to see in your marriage. Hope makes it difficult for you to give up in sorrow and despair! Hope supplies you with a rugged determination to see your marriage transformed!
An example of hope that wins
“But we were hoping that it was He who was going to redeem Israel… ” Luke 24:19-21
Hope is important because it is a fuel of faith. The Lord Jesus’ disciples were hoping that Jesus was going to be the Redeemer of Israel, even though the last time they saw Him, He was dead by crucifixion. Their hope was eventually rewarded and was made manifest to them, even beyond their expectations that He was going to redeem Israel alone, but also the whole world!
“But for him that is joined to all the living, there is hope, for a living dog is better than a dead lion.” Ecclesiastes 9:4
Activating hope to transform your marriage
“Rejoicing in hope, patient in tribulation, continuing steadfastly in prayer.” Romans 12:12
1) Rejoice in hope.
This is a very important factor in activating hope to transform your marriage. What your marriage is going through should not be allowed to cause you pain, regret or sorrow. Don’t focus on what is wrong, but rather how it could be made right.
When you rejoice in hope, you are drawing strength and wisdom from God! To rejoice means to keep thanking the Lord that He has power to transform and heal your marriage! “Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say: rejoice!” Philippians 4:4
Remember the real enemy is not your spouse but the devil. When he sees you rejoicing by praising the Lord always in spite of the circumstances he is throwing your way, he will have no choice than to remove his hands from your marriage!
2) Be patient in tribulation.
Patience is key to transforming your marriage. It takes time for you to change, and it also takes time for your partner or children to change. Never take rash decisions based on your feelings, because feelings are deceptive. You must decisively be patient especially with your spouse. “Love is patient…love hopes all things.” 1 Corinthians 13:4,7
Be slow to wrath and be slow to judge. Don’t give in to pressure to fight for yourself. Impatience has destroyed a lot of marriages and homes, because one spouse refused to patiently listen to the other spouse. God does not help those who can help themselves. He never fights for the strong but He gladly fights for and defends those who relinquish their strength to Him! “…The patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit. Do not hasten in your spirit to be angry, for anger rests in the bosom of fools” – Ecclesiastes 7:8,9.
People who are often impatient and are quick to get angry are easy for the devil to manipulate. The devil knows impatience is a human weakness and an advantage for him. Patience is often mistaken for foolishness by naturally-minded people, but it is a strong weapon in the realm of the spirit. Patience wears your enemies out!
3) Continue steadfast in prayer.
It is only by prayer that God by His Spirit can reveal to you things that are hidden and causing problems in your marriage or home. It is only by prayer that those issues can be resolved!
Gossiping to your friends and family members about your marriage is actually inviting more trouble and confusion. So, cease!
Shut your door and enter into the secret place; “But you, when you pray, go into your room, and when you have shut your door, pray to your Father (God) Who is in the secret place, and your Father who sees in secret will reward you openly.” Matthew 6:6. With faith in your heart, pray consistently, for the power is prayer is maximized through consistency and steadfastness.
Be filled with hope and stay tuned to the voice of the Spirit!
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Angela Lowe, MS. Ed., LPC
Angela Lowe is a licensed Professional Counselor, trained Biblical Counselor and certified Holistic Health Coach. Her kingdom mandate is to restore God’s counsel to transform lives, marriages, and churches worldwide.